Admin note: What follows is directly copied from the original tumblr post, with only minor corrections for WordPress formatting. Or where it’s funny.
This fic is thirty-six fucking chapters holy SHIT @huntsvillerailfan WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME. Yeah, this is an adventure alright!
At exactly 125k words, this is the longest fic I’ve ever undertaken an MST of. The second longest was Law Plus Chaos at almost 87k words, and the third? Celebrian, at 21.5k. For context, My Immortal (which I sporked back in the day but never finished) is only around 20k, not counting author’s notes, according to Encyclopedia Dramatica.
For further context, Harper Lee’s To Kill A Mockingbird is a little over 99k words.
So basically what I’m saying is, expect plenty of intermissions. Anyway, I’ll kick off this novel-length travesty of a fanfic with an out-of-character sporking.
Sometimes I wonder what compels people to write at such length for derivative works. Then I remember that that one Ace Attorney crackfic I wrote with my older brother hit 121,180 words by the time it was done.
Not to mention my outline for The Life of a Great Sinner is already 6,279 words. As for MGS Offscreen, that planning document is sitting at 5,305, and the “scraps” documents of random scenes being written ahead of time is already 47,566 words and counting. I fully expect it to have at least another thousand by the time this is uploaded.
The point is that I’m a hypocrite for complaining about length. But at least I don’t write horrible Mary Sues, amirite? Haha ha… ha………
(Airey from the future: *looks blankly at FeetGround, currently 98 chapters and 338k words*)
Silver yelled and Twilight grabbed his hoof “Twilight, I’m sorry, my little princess, tell Luna I’m sorry for leaving her without saying goodbye, and I’m sorry, for leaving you…” silver managed to get off one last kiss before he was pulled off the edge and was gone from sight, into the abyss…
–FINAL JUDGEMENT–
Cold.
Fear.
Peace.
Fire.
Brimstone.
Sulfur.
all these combined, and yet somehow none of them, was all Silver Haze could feel as he floated endlessly in a sightless soundless unexplainable void of pain and pleasure.
“Pain and pleasure”? Is this what happens if you get sent to (a classical depiction of) Hell as a masochist?
He felt his mere existent here was breaking some vow of silence of this unearthly realm that no life should ever lay its mortal eyes upon, and perhaps in his predicament, that vow had not been broken.
unable to stop himself from drifting towards a distant light, he saw many visions, signs of eons past, future, and present. As he floated into and out of existent, perhaps it was Twilight and Luna’s love for him that kept him from giving into his great destiny
when you die, stay dead please
as he would one day be forced to endure one way or another anyway, and that even though he was giving them safety, as they were far safer without him, there was still much danger he could protect them from with his might, and even the most heroic beings give in to the greed that love can cause upon the mortal soul.
While there is still the obvious huge problem of run-on sentences that never end, I will say I am impressed that words are actually being spelled correctly in this fic.
You’ve improved, SilverHaze.
Thinking about it, despite all Silvers bravado and self made charms, Silver feared his mortality and his emotions that could bring his end to him faster then expected, for no Alicorn was truly immortal and though time could not take them to the gates of the next realm, there were many other shortcuts that could make short work of them, be it poisons, blades, or a mob of those you cannot bring yourself to harm, even though with the Alicorns, death was playing chess with a board of nothing but pawns, he never ran out of them, and there was no king for you to take to win.
It was a game where victory only came to those who accept defeat, or take one risk too many.
Yet perhaps the quickest way to take an Alicorn to the grave was an attachment to those who could not cheat time like them, one who’s existent would end in a blink, and in the dark times around that, death seems like a mercy. But perhaps, because he knew that being immortal in theory would make it that much more painful for those who he left behind, those who expected to have him for centuries, would make it that much worse.
(stares blankly at screen, pops a Bontan ame in mouth, chews it slowly, swallows, and moves onto the next paragraph without saying anything)
This is when he made a choice,
He didn’t want to die yet, not yet,
die die die die die die die die die
silver felt that little spark of anger, of defiance linked so close to rage, to his mind where magic burned inside of him, and suddenly, it was not the emptiness that greeted him, but an burning flame of rage, of anger…
Of LIFE
and suddenly, a stupid, STUPID plan formed in the head of the Alicorn,
As per usual.
if this was where his life would end, he was going to be defiant, no entity that had taken him from life so cruelly would gain the pleasure of taking his spark, his soul, and so, taking hold of his own life, picturing it as a raging red candle that burned within him…
and silver haze blew onto it.
Silver felt his body fade as the little bit of life drained out of him, yet no death rushed into fill the void, he was empty, a husk of life, and the void wanted souls, not husks, and discarded him, casting him away, discarding the husk to a realm that even the shadows did not bother going to.
What is going on???
Did the Gary Stu just pull a fast one on oblivion itself?
–LIMBO–
–TIME: 0/0/0000, 00:00–
Silver haze was dead,
We already know he’s going to be inexplicably alive for the duration of this fic so why don’t we just cut to that and skip all the pseudo-metaphysical bullshit.
there was no other way to put it he had moved on shuffled off the mortal coil. Silver Haze had breathed his last breath and had kicked the can…
so why was he still aware of everything around him?
Because not even death can conquer a Mary Sue.
silver haze looked around for some sort of bright light or a fiery pit of Taurus to damn him for his defiance, or even a big old gate of Perls, like he blankly remembered when he had first…well, died. but there was nothing noda zip zilch. silver was just floating there in space completely alone.
…Kars? Is that you?
“…well, this was far less climactic then I thought it would be…” silver mumbled to himself, “Maybe I’ll just wait for something…anything” Silver relaxed and began counting “1…2…3…4…5…6…”
–LIMBO–
—Time 0/30/0000, 23:50–
“2677800… 2677801…2677802…2667803, wait horseapples that’s not right, wait, where was I, uhhh….RAHHHHHHH” Silver groaned as he continuously floated through space and time,
Either way he should definitely pull a Kars and just stop thinking.
suddenly, he saw a bright light and a booming voice.
“AH, SILVER, I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR WHERE YOU WENT, COME MY CHILD, YOUR TIME HAS COME”
If this is God, I’m going to scream.
Silver looked towards the light and instead of heading towards it, he planted his feet and snorted, “Hold on big man, I ant going nowhere until I know what happened to twilight after I died, if your so all powerful, then prove it, SHOW ME WHAT WILL HAPPEN!”
“AS YOU WISH!” The voice spoke “LET YOU SEE A FUTURE, ONE OF MANY THAT COULD OCCUR FROM YOUR PASSING”
and suddenly images of a future without him, of one where his seed had planted the roots of two children into twilight’s being,
BUT TWILIGHT WAS THE ONE HE USED PROTECTION WITH
and that he was revered as a hero for his sacrifice.
however, silver was not satisfied, with a world without him,
Because Mary Sues need to be the center of attention at all times, yes, I’ve noticed.
and this being of power had given him direction, it had inadvertently shown him the path to life.
and thus he turned himself away from the bright light and galloped as far away from it as he could, he heard the voice try and call him back, yet he pressed on for what felt like forever, running through time and space itself, The voice calling after him
“NO MY CHILD, YOU HAVE THE TAINT OF DEATH AND YOUR FATHER, YOU CANNOT RETURN AS YOURSELF, YOU WILL DOOM THE ONES YOU LOVE, HAVE YOU NO SENSE OF SELFLESSNESS???????!?!?!? YOU ARE A HUSK OF LIFEYOUR SOUL LONG GONE, THAT WORLD IS NO LONGER YOURS TO CALL HOME!!!!!”
Silver ignored the echoing voice,
I will admit I don’t often see fics where the self-insert main character is so desperate for glory that they straight-out ignore the will of God. Or totally-not-God, as the case may be.
only thinking of twilight and Luna, the same mantra over and over again.
Have to keep them safe, have to protect them…
Have to keep them safe, have to protect them…
Have to keep them safe, have to protect them…
From what?
so Silver kept running, galloping through the ending void, his mind, body coming back to his senses, yet all they felt was unendurable pain and confusion, without a soul to guide them towards life, until he felt himself hit a wall, and then go through the wall,
and felt everything go black.
–The otherworld–
A cloaked figure awoke
The hunt was afoot.
So do you remember how, during A Haze In Equestria!!!!, I kept making jokes about how the Gary Stu (by virtue of being a Gary Stu) was an unholy abomination that needed to be eradicated from Equestria?
I don’t know whether to feel insulted or vindicated.
…I will admit that it’s a semi-cool plot point, and could be an indicator that the author has improved in more ways than just learning how to use spellcheck. But I’m not optimistic.
—1 month later—
silver’s head was beating profusely and he held a hoof up to it. he groaned. “what happened he asked no one in particular where am i?” silver opened his eyes as they adjusted to the light. he was in a library with book on all shelves. “the library!” he exclaimed!
“I know exactly where I am now! After all, there’s only one in Equestria!”
and he jumped out of bed, only to be met with a terrible pain that raked his entire being. and he cried out in pain as she slowly drifted back into his bed and remained motionless, but he reopens his eyes once he heard a familiar voice, one of which he knew and loved, and then came another voice, yet another one he knew and loved. he recognized them as Luna and twilight.
At this point I’m hoping for it to go down the threesome/harem route, because cheaters are the scum of the earth* and that’s the only way it’ll get a real resolution.
Since Twilight and Luna teaming up to kick his ass is definitely not gonna happen.
*I maintain that it doesn’t count as cheating if the other girl is an alternate personality of your girlfriend and also may not even have been real in the first place, depending on how much gaslighting was going on.
Silver looked to the door as he saw a purple and blue mares approach the door “Silver? are you awake?” asked a voice that soothed Silver, yet made him exited as well.
Reminder that the Gary Stu has a horrifying 15-inch penis.
“I’m awake” he said as twilight and Luna entered the room further “how are you Silver dear?” Luna asked as they both went to either side of I’m. “I’m doing fine, thanks you” Silver began “I thought I would never see you again…at least that’s the last thing i remember thinking before i lost consciousness, so what happened?” silver asked. “you seemed to have face an eternal struggle when you were dragged into the void after you defeated your father, Sombra” said Luna.
at Luna’s words, memories began to flood into silver’s head. the battle, the void, the terrible pain…he was hurt by the intensity of what he remembered, and the strange feeling that he did not leave the void without taking something with him…
I thought he was soulless now. Shouldn’t that be “the strange feeling that he did not leave the void without leaving something behind…”?
but he was also kind of happy to see the loves of his life
Only ‘kind of’?
and he smiled “he has never been so happy to see you guys again, your two are the only reason I am still alive I would have let the light take me if I didn’t think of you and they all smiled and laughed twilight and Luna both helped him up as he smiled.
“Much has changed silver since you have come back, the consequences of your actions have been felt throughout Equestria and beyond, when you banished Sombra the smoke disappeared but it left something behind that changed many ponies and threw the scales of the world out of whack” Luna could only sigh before continuing.
I might not watch the show anymore, but I think I can safely say regardless that “out of whack” is not something that Princess Luna would say.
“now chaos exists in lots of ponies instead of only being created by a few, now a lot of ponies have invented new things and now the crown of Equestria is struggling to keep control of Equestria
VIVE LA RÉVOLUTION
from the other nations that are trying to take advantage of our weakened state.” Yet Luna’s mood switched as a smile got on her face.
“but it doesn’t mater for now you are safe and that is all that maters! Huzza!!!” Luna cheered
Considering Luna’s a head of state, no wonder Equestria’s government is falling apart.
as she leaned over and kissed Silver Haze on the cheek which annoyed twilight, but she didn’t want to fight because Silver was still weak and needed to rest instead of fight. So for now she was ok with it.
No. He’s a filthy dirty cheater and he deserves to be destroyed.
I hate this fucking Gary Stu so much
and Silver smiled as he suddenly stood up as he heard a voice.
“DARLING!~ You are awake oh how fabulous!” Rarity cried as she burst through the doors of the library “it is just so…so GREAT! DARLING we were also worried about you!~” rarity said in a sing song voice as she wiped away a tear from her eye.
Suddenly Rainbow Dash burst thorough the door, drinking a bunch of colors as she flew by
Drinking, what? Drinking?
“yo Silver, i heard you woke up, it would be totally awesome if we could get in some flying lessons later” said Rainbow “sure Rainbow, but once i get feel a bit better, then we can fly” said Silver.
Applejack entered soon after Rainbow Dash “howdey selver, ya feelin any betteer?”
I THOUGHT WE COULD LEAVE THE BAD SOUTHERN DRAWL BEHIND US!
applejack asked sincerely. Almost hiding behind Applejack, Fluttershy walked in but she was shy and scared and intimidated because she still had feeling for Silver Haze
when the fuck
but she worked up the currage to go to him “ummm…hi….umm…silver….uhhhh….ummm, I-I’m happy…that….that…ummm…youhappentobealright..EKK!” And with that fluttershy dashed out the door with a blush on her face.
Just then, a pink blur jumped over her and sat ontop of Silver and blew a party horn right into his face “YAY SURPRISE GLAD-YOU-ARN’T-DEAD-AND-YOU-SAVED-EQUESTRIA PARTY WHOOOOHOOOOO!!!!” Pinkie yelled waving her hooves in the air, somehow, everyone in the room now had a party hat on.
Because that’s exactly what someone who just, uh, came out of a month-long coma or whatever needs. Worst Pony bounding in and causing a ruckus. Yep.
Hey, y’all wanna know why I hate Pinkie Pie so much, apart from the fact that she’s annoying and I despise random access humor?
Has anyone ever read The Rising Sun by John Toland? It’s about the rise and fall of Japanese Empire in the 30s and 40s.
It’s very well-written and notable in the fact that while it by no means vilifies the Japanese and in fact is fairly sympathetic towards them – and especially Emperor Hirohito – it at the same time makes no excuses for them and also doesn’t ignore or skate over Japanese war crimes, which a lot of other books (and even school curriculums) do. I strongly recommend it to anyone with even a passing interest in WWII and especially in the Pacific theatre of the war.
Anyway, naturally this book has chapters about the atomic bombs dropped on Japan at the end of the war. First-hand accounts in them. Fascinating stuff.
One of the accounts – and for the life of me I can’t remember if it was Hiroshima or Nagasaki – involves a horse who was partially caught in the blast. All of its skin was ripped off, leaving only exposed muscle mass.
The poor horse was pink.
Silver laughed “Its so great to see you all I know we will have many challenges ahead but we can do it! TOGETHER!” He exclaimed, the mane 6 were moved by Silvers lack of caring in the face of challenge and cheered together!
I don’t think “lack of care in the face of challenge” is very inspiring, just irresponsible.
The world of Equestria would be changed forever, for on that day, the world seemed to be the calm before the storm as the future would be unstable, the barrier between life and death torn and the hole may or may not be found, and yet with the future so uncertain, in this library in the tree, seven friends and a dragon, found peace and friendship.
Wait, Spike’s there too? Thanks for mentioning.
Also: Mane Six + Gary Stu + Luna = eight friends. I wonder who’s getting left out?
And even though Silver knew the path ahead was dangerous, he knew, for this one second, that he was safe. And that he would be happy, for as long as this moment lasted.
Fuck you.
The author’s note mentioned that the boyfriend that I previously denied the existence of was the one who convinced her to write an ungodly long sequel. I will give her this: I think this fic might have been edited.
By someone who sucks at editing.
Seriously, there aren’t as many misspelled words, and it stayed in third-person the whole time. Those are about the only improvements.
I do not have high hopes for this fic.
Well, anyway, that was the prologue. Chapter one should be up tomorrow. I think I’ll shoot for an intermission every three or four chapters, and if all goes well I should have this whole thing completed before my hiatus.
Of course, it might very well be the last multi-chapter fic I spork before my hiatus, but, well, we’ll see.
See ya tomorrow! whenever I get the next archive put back up! My classes + job are kicking my asss!
So, What Colour is Your Toothbrush? 
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